When facing challenging situations, it is important to think through your options. The one thing you do not want to do is to have a knee-jerk reaction and throw your kids in school for six months while you have a crisis! Because kids appear to be more resilient, we sometimes mistakenly assume that it is easy for them to adapt, when in truth children are very sensitive to change and upheaval. Quick changes for which they are unprepared can cause insecurity and make learning difficult. The adjustment of changing school situations can be very hard on them and hard for you to help them when you are already stressed with your situation.

Kids are surprisingly perceptive about their family life. If they are worried about what is happening at home, particularly concerning illness, they are not going to learn well in a classroom environment anyway. If they are wondering if Mommy is feeling badly today, or if Grandfather will still be alive when they get home, it is no wonder that they will do poorly in school.

You might want to continue homeschooling even if you are dealing with illness in the family. Children gain security by forging through a crisis with you. Your presence is the most reassuring thing in their lives. Besides, there is a good chance your children may learn something they could learn no other way. We often experience more of God in difficulties.

One of the things your children will learn is reliance on God. They will be watching you as you navigate through this trial – watching you desperately need and depend upon God in a way people do when He allows a crisis to come. You notice that I did not say you would be doing everything right, being the perfect example. When problems come, they seem to bring out my weakness, not my strength! You can, however, model asking and trusting God, leaning on His mercy the best you can. That is what they will see and follow.

Children will also learn that they can be part of the solution. They love to feel that they have contributed to the well-being of the family. Give them ways to be helpful, and tell them you appreciate them. Families are bonded when they face difficulty together.

Children learn that they can pray and see God working. When difficulties come, children will learn that God does indeed answer prayer. They have an opportunity to see God work in their family to heal, take care of them, and comfort. Be sure to communicate to them what you see God doing for your family, and pray together with them, assuring them that God hears their prayers.

Let us now address some possible exceptions. Surely there are times when it would be best if a family put their children into school. Let us explore some scenarios.

High school students missing a year or even a few months at this stage of education could throw off graduation. On the other hand, would that be so bad? Consider taking an extra year. For many kids it would not be a bad idea, especially if the difficult situation will resolve.

A situation that is not likely to change for a long period of time might be an exception. An example might be having a high-need or special needs child who limits your ability to homeschool other children. A family member with a chronic illness is another example of a long-term situation, but before you throw in the towel for home education, look for creative solutions. Could you get special help for the high-need child every day for a few hours that would free time to spend with your other children? Do you have a grandparent or relative who would be willing to help? Maybe you can homeschool on the weekends or at odd times of the day. The important question to ask yourself is, “What is going to provide the most secure and happy childhood for my child?” There will be several things to consider, but asking this question can help clarify what might be the best answer today. Philippians 2:13 says, “It is God who works in you to will and act according to His good purpose.” I believe God has a will and purpose for your family, which He will reveal for you to follow!

How can you cope? Make your child as independent as possible. This is not the time to try a unit study. Look for more traditional curricula, like textbooks and workbooks. Computer programs for children who are able are also a good choice. Most children will get bored using this method long-term, but it could get you through a difficult year. Consider utilizing some of the supplementary programs or co-ops available in your area, if transportation is not an issue.

Remember that if your child is in second grade or below, you should not expect independence. Your challenge at this level is to find a way to make school happen. When my son was ill, my kindergärtner desperately wanted to “do school” and needed some Mommy-time as well, which was a rarity just then. She was an early riser, so before anybody was out of bed, we got some juice and did our forty-five minutes of school. It helped satisfy our need to stay connected and kept her on track educationally as well.

Home schooling through difficulty is stressful for parents, and if you are stressed, your children are stressed too. Do not expect them to have a great year. This is survival. Children can make up for a bad year. They can turn around and make great gains when their world is settled again. Keep your eye on the big picture. Sometimes our most desperate situations are allowed by God for reasons we may never understand yet are of profound importance in the Kingdom. It may be that God has this difficulty tailor-made for your family, and in some strange way, it could be the best year you have had yet. Finally, do not forget to ask God for direction in all your searching for an answer.

The post Homeschooling Through Life’s Difficulties appeared first on Texas Home School Coalition.

We started with Calvert’s program and quite simply loved every moment of our days together.  Home schooling awakened me to the idea that being a mother was far more than meals, diapers, naptimes, and schedules.  Suddenly I was interacting with Krista and our three-year-old son Zachary in a far more focused and intentional way.  At the end of the first year I asked, “Why stop now when it is working so well?”  We continued to grow and learn together.

Five years later God graced us with another daughter, Claire.  By this time, Mac and I were enjoying serving the home school community through our support group, Christian Home Educators of Austin, as logistics chairmen. Later Mac was elected for a term as chairman.  Four more years went by, and God surprised us with a special blessing in August of 1993 … our youngest child, Jacob.  Soon after, our peaceful little world fell apart.

In November of 1993, after weeks of headaches and what we thought was the flu, Zachary, 9, was diagnosed with a brain tumor.  Our world screeched to a halt.  These kinds of things happened to people in Reader’s Digest or the movies, not to us, not to Zachary.  We had four young children, ages 12, 9, 4, and 4 months.  Surgery followed two days after Christmas, and we waited for the biopsy report.  We were optimistic.  I felt God’s glory was to be seen in this and soon the doctors would be amazed at the quick recovery and perfect healing.  But we had more bad news.  Our doctor explained with tears in her eyes that this tumor, a glioblastoma multiforme, was deadly.  It would continue to spread, and Zachary had less than a year to live.  We did what any loving parents in that position would do.  We said, “No way.  Not to my child!”

The following year was one of intense searches for a cure or treatment that would save Zach’s life.  We tried reputable alternative therapies.  We knew God could heal him, and we prayed, begged, and agonized before God’s throne.  Surely this was an opportunity for God to show the world how truly powerful He was!  We waited, and Zachary grew sicker.  Finally, in desperation, and at Zachary’s request, we agreed to radiation and chemotherapy that would prolong his life for a few months.  The treatment gave Zach a few months without symptoms – a time we now look back on with gratitude.  We had a wonderful summer together as a family.

But the fall came and, with it, new symptoms.  By this time, we had begun to sense that the Holy Spirit had different plans for Zachary than we did.  That summer, with his sister, Zach did a Bible study, “Hinds Feet on High Places for Children.”  It is a phenomenal book that deals with learning to trust God in places that look very hard and frightening to us.  Something happened in Zach’s heart that summer.  He did not want to die but trusted God to do with his life as He desired.

The body of Christ was truly the best thing in our lives that year.  Our parents, my brother and family, and Mac’s sister and daughter were a steady support.  And then there was our home school community.  I do not have room here to tell of the feats of generosity and the lengths to which they went to minister to our suffering family.  I do not think I cooked a meal for eleven months, as there was a steady supply of dinners in our freezer.  We experienced God’s love in the most tangible ways, and we will always be grateful to God for the enormous way His people rallied to us in that time.

Zachary died that fall on November 13, 1994; a part of us died with him.  We sensed we could never be the same again.  We were right.  Now began the task of healing, of trying to understand why, and of finding our lives again.  We did not hurry.  Grief takes enormous energy and lots of time – far more than most people allow themselves.  I found that my perspective on life had changed.  Somehow, my children were more important to me than ever before.  I knew that our time together was valuable and that I could not take anything for granted.  I found they became a greater priority than ever before.

I began to understand a little more about God, too.  He did not do things the way I wanted Him to, and for many months I was very angry with Him.  It is hard to explain, but I knew He was okay with my emotions; I never sensed anything but love and patience from Him while He waited for me to find answers to my questions.  I have come away with a deeper respect for His omniscience and a deeper love for Him too.  I KNOW where my son is, and it is a comfort to know we will be together again someday.

It is funny how life just marches on no matter what happens.  It has been 8 1/2 years since Zachary’s death.  Our oldest daughter, Krista, will be twenty-one when this is printed and finishing her junior year at the University of Houston as a violin major.  Claire is thirteen and is our budding writer.  Jacob, our youngest, is nine.  Jacob and Claire are both being homeschooled.

A few years ago, I attended a Whole Hearted Mother’s conference.  Jean Flemming was teaching, and at one point she shared about a women’s Bible study she was leading.  A prayer rose up in me:  “Lord, how I would love to mentor young mothers…” Then I laughed at myself – like I had time or ability to do that!  A week later, Mary James called me.  We did not know each other very well yet, so I was very surprised as she shared a vision she had of starting a support group for new home schoolers.  She was just wondering if I might be interested in helping.  The prayer I had prayed instantly came to mind.  I told her I would pray about it, but I suspected God had already put the prayer in my heart so that I would know what to say when she called.  As we worked and dreamed together, Smoothing the Way was born, and it now serves new home schoolers across Texas and beyond.  Now Smoothing the Way is a place where mothers can learn the how-tos of home schooling in order to minister to and nurture their children.

I am amazed as I look back over the years I have homeschooled and see how faithful God has been to our family!  Through tragedy He has brought the restoration and rest that comes from embracing His plan and has allowed us to know Him better.  I could not have said those words a few years back.  But God.…  He has truly begun to heal and change us through this fire.  Life really is not that long for any of us.  My mission to homeschool has a sense of urgency to it, a realization that my children really are on loan from God.  What a privilege it is to have the opportunity to capture their hearts for God so they can be a light to this new generation of young people who are so hungry for a God they can know!  Together the home schooling community can make an impact on our culture for Christ.

Diane Broadway, along with Smoothing the Way co-founder, Mary James, was THSC’s 2002 Home School Leader of the Year.

The post Meet the Broadway Family appeared first on Texas Home School Coalition.